another day that I feel blank.
Thinking, typing and backspacing with nothing releasing through my mouth. I am not sad nor am I happy. I’m tired physically and mentally. I’ve caught on before I went downhill. Me catching myself before falling doesn’t matter since there won’t be anyone to lift me up before I fall. People will pick up my shatters but not because they care for me but because they feel bad for me. When will this end? Will there ever be a day where someone will actually stay by my side? I want to experience pure happiness just one more time in my life. I’m tired of feeling stuffy and lonely.
What if I’m like this the rest of my teenage years? It’s unfair. Why can’t I have a bite of joy but everyone else can?! Even the ones who don’t deserve it! But I guess this is life, right? You cannot change your destiny no matter how many times you try to. You are born and forced to live a life that you were destined to have. You won’t know why you were chosen to go down this path but one day you will. I need to remind myself that everything happens for a reason and that destiny is a beautiful word. I bet it doesn’t have a sad ending. No matter how many times I fall and shatter, I must stick myself back together if there is no one to do it for me and keep it moving. I must see the ending to this melodrama. You can’t see the ending when your dead or gloomy so just wait for the possibly happy ending.
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